Wednesday, April 19, 2006Okay...
I recently watched the musical play "CATS"...
It's a really good musical...
And yet...
I somehow found myself restless and kinda bored while watching it...
And then I realized why...
It's because I am not contented with just watching a play...
I want to be the one doing it...
I want to be one of those people up on the stage...
Dancing, singing, acting, performing and entertaining everyone in the audience..
That is what i want to be doing for the rest of my life...
A book i've read says that as kids...
We already know what we want to do for the rest of our lives.But as we grow old, certain factors lead us into abandoning those ambitions and dreams.Instead, we do what we think is "practical" and "logical"...And I know for a fact that even as a kid, gusto ko ng magperform.I've always enjoyed making titos and titas happy by dancing at gatherings or doing something like that.And come to think of it, I've never been more passionate about anything else.I can truly say that I am at my best when I am infront of a huge audience.I know no tiredness nor fatigue when i'm practing for an intermission number or an interschool competition...But the hard truth is, there really are certain factors that could hinder me from doing what i love best.You see, I want to help out my family financially after I graduate. And doing theater- no matter how fun it is - wouldn't really be the most stable way of earning cash.And that is potentially problematic..
OH! OH!
And that book also says that when a person really wants something, the whole universe conspires to bring him closer to his dream..!!! And when a person starts doing something new, he's almost sure to succed at it. Something called "Beginner's luck" it says..
But I just don't see it!!!!
Where is my beginner's luck???!!!!
Why has the world not conspired yet???!!!!
And why do I keep spelling 'beginner' with double 'Gs' instead of double 'Ns'???!!!!
Ugh.
What is a wannabe performer to do???
Hmn.
Whatever.
God has his own plans for me - despite my spectacular plans for myself.
I am such a drama Queen.
No doubt about it.
Foxy
10:26 PM
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